I think the failure isn't in your inadequacy; I think this is a failure of culture norms. Part of what I'm trying to accomplish here is a path out of these feelings to a healthier expression of who you are. Okay so if you've read enough of my blog, you know nothing I write here is wank material, so you must be getting something out of this... Bear with me.
What I want, if I had my end game, is a more holistic concept of masculinity. This would be one that accepts gays, accepts men in care-giver roles, accepts "malepolish," accepts crying, and allows men to be weak when they need to be. I want a masculinity that doesn't abuse women. I want a masculinity that is inclusive and not "me first." I want a masculinity allows my submissive partner to express who he is without fear of negative judgment from his "bros." All of these things already exist within masculinity, but if you want acceptance, you are going to have to fight for it.
This is a call to arms, a call to all the betas pretending to be leaders and hating themselves. Stand up, and be who you are, because SOMEONE has to take the first step. Why not let it be you? Do you really think everyone will hate you? You may just find that your friends have all felt the same way as you and we're waiting for someone else to speak up first. It's all the same unspoken fear. "I'm not a real man because..."
No man is that real man. Each one of you is a human being! Each is an individual, and frankly none of us are buying your tough guy crap anyway. The thicker the layer the more we roll our eyes.
Truth is people will judge you regardless of what you do, so you might as well tell everyone to go to hell and just do it. And while you're at it, tell your friends that their sexist jokes aren't funny and to stop normalizing objectification and abuse of women.
Welcome to the 21st century.
You're absolutely right - men should feel free to live as they are - not who society wishes us to be. I am one strong confident submissive man who is starting to become more open about his desire to follow - not lead - with a strong confident woman who knows best. Thank you for this posting.
ReplyDeleteDeferentially,
john
Thank you, john. It needed to be said.
DeleteMay your call to arms be answered. When guys are still kids they develop heirarchies among themselves. While societal norms may work for those at the top, I was the poster child for last pick. When puberty hit I spent years telling myself this will not work the way it is "supposed to". My dating life subsequently bore this out. Eventually a strong woman accepted me. Later I became conscious of wanting to serve and encourage her to take control. Being a strong woman she only took what she wanted. Pity because I swear she gets way more turned on when she humors me. So do lead the charge fair domme!
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